Tuesday, November 8, 2011

I Was Thinking.....

I preface my story like this because I try to avoid such mundane tasks. Anyways onto my story.

Today as I was driving I started thinking about a particular situation and how I wanted deal with it, coming up with a few strategies. And I thought to myself the same thing I have thought many times, something that has almost become my life mantra of sorts.  Something I tell myself as sort of a pep talk so I don't just roll over and play possum.  Here it is "Don't let life happen to you, happen to life".  I am sure many say it and many believe it to be a great motivational saying. And honestly it usually works for me.

Something was different today though. Today I said it and just thought what the heck am I saying?  And I started to replay moments in my life when things got to a point where I thought how did I get here?  The most obvious memory being my divorce. I also can remember simple moments like when I have been super lazy and my house looks like a storm hit it or even lately just wishing my house wasn't so unorganized.  The point is many times in my life I have thought,how did I get to this point, what did I do wrong? 

As I thought about this more I started to think how this mantra my  contradictsmy beliefs of this life being part of a bigger plan. Meaning I got here because God knows this is where I need to be and knows I need to learn something from wherever here is.  I didn't get to a certain point or in a situation because I didn't happen to life.

This all may seem a little crazy but my knee injury has taken its toll on me and not just physically.  Emotionally too. So I have been trying to see God in all of this and it is funny how He works.  Something as simple as spilt juice and it has forced me to depend on others, ask for help and give up some control.  All things I pray about daily. All things that I have the hardest time doing. Maybe this was my reminder that I don't always have to be happening to life mostly I need to slow down and listen to the quiet voice.